Looks like I'll be 0 for 2 this week

Two auditions at the beginning of this week. At the G&S were the 2 mezzos I most hoped wouldn't show, as both of them have not only done leads w/ the company, but have been hand-picked for special chamber productions. Worse, they're both lovely people, so I can't even hate 'em! Anyway, they both got called back, I didn't, and as I specifically said I wouldn't do chorus (I've already done chorus twice for this show), I won't be doing that show.

Monday was the new musical. The accompanist was having a difficult time settling on a tempo, though he generally erred in favor of too slow. I hope that was was the cause of the rather strained-looking polite smiles on the panel's face, and not my singing. I think I sang pretty well, given the accompaniment, but wasn't asked to last night's callbacks. I overheard someone say they would cast the show almost immediately, offering roles as early as this morning. I've heard nothing, haven't even been offered chorus, so I won't be surprised if I end up getting a "thanks but no thanks" e-mail. Hearing the woman ahead of me, and the guy ahead of her, both of whom had been in the ensemble of the last show I saw the group do, I wondered if perhaps I should hold off on auditioning for these folks until I can belt. Or maybe I just won't worry about it.

Auditioning is a funny thing. I look forward to it, perhaps because of the "hope" factor - "I hope they ask me to play X; she gets to sing all that great music", "I'd love to do this show", "I want to break into this company"; that sorta thing. If I'm less than satisfied with how I did, I start with the "shoulda woulda"s. If I think I did well, then I start dreaming about getting this or that juicy role, only to be disappointed when they don't cast me, or offer me chorus when I was hoping for something meatier.

Not getting cast also makes me wonder how my voice sounds to others, how I come across - is there something I still need to work on, or is it just a matter of taste or something else out of my control. Maybe they don't like my freckles, or they want someone who's older, younger, thinner, fatter, taller, shorter...